Thursday, August 11, 2016

The Rat

There was a rat in my boyfriend's mother's closet, and as the bravest man in the world it was his responsibility to murder it. At the time, he had a job at a science lab where they had to suffocate mice in bags... the company later got sued for having a secret barn full of sick goats and lost their animal license. 

The rat was in an old shoe, and it actually was pretty cute. But as I remarked on this, he reminded me of all of the diseases that rats carry so I wouldn't get emotional. 

In preparation, he went to a safe and pulled out a gun. He had to defend himself. 

He scooped the rat in a bag, and he took it outside. He banged it on the ground, and the rat died instantly. 

"I kinda still want to shoot it."

"No, that will make a big mess."

And that is the story of how I aided a murder.