As many of you know, or don't know--I don't really know who reads my blog besides Kelli (hey, Kelli)--I've been trying to get a book published for a long time. It's hard to justify how much time I've spent writing and editing now that my other friends are starting to make money with real adult jobs.
As anyone who has tried to get traditionally published knows, you have to write a pitch, or a query, to an agent, who decides whether or not to request more of your manuscript. My first query, submitted to a rough guesstimate of sixty billion people, was apparently... not as breathtaking as the Sistine Chapel... it was actually about as breathtaking as a fat man trying to hike. That was a terrible joke. I'm so sorry you had to read that.
Anyway, I just sent out a revised query. It reads somewhat like this:
Dear any agent,
P.S. This is also my dating technique.